The Wait

latte

I’m currently camped out in a coffee shop, trying to look cool. I’ve got my fancy new Surface Pro, my tiny overpriced pastry and the obligatory espresso beverage of choice. This is supposed to be my time to blog. And the thoughts are supposed to be flowing freely and abundantly, so that you fine people can read along and be inspired, or laugh or cry.

My thoughts aren’t flowing freely. They’re flowing like molasses through cheese cloth. And, I’m about 90% distracted by a pigeon outside who’s on crumb duty.

This is nothing new to me. Nothing is coming quickly to me these days. If you’ve been reading my blog lately, you know that I’m currently in a pretty big season of wait. I don’t do waiting well. I can’t sit still for that long.

It’s like signing up for a 4 course meal simply because you liked the dessert offering. Sure, the appetizer may be cow tongue and the main course liver, but there’s chocolate lava cake for dessert, so power through! That’s what I’ve been doing since I decided that I was going to chart the course I’m on. Powering through.

You tend to go a little numb after a while of waiting. It’s impossible not to. I hate that feeling of numbness… Of nothing new… Of old hat. And, I hate that I stop feeling purposeful when waiting for something over an extended period of time.

I’d put my gym time on the back burner, and my writing, my leisure activities, etc. Pretty much anything that didn’t directly increase my chances of moving forward with the goal I was idolizing was put aside for later.

That’s not cool.

To change this, I came up with a list of what to do during The Wait. How to keep from going numb.

*Clears throat to read inscribed scroll of insight*

  1. Create other goals. Obsessing over the one big goal will do 2 things – throw your life balance off and cause burnout. Create smaller goals and things to work on that are achievable while you continue towards the big goal.
  2. Don’t obsess. Find distractions for those times when you want to get lost in every microscopic detail of your end goal. Dissecting the same animal over and over again isn’t as productive as exploring other species. When you trip and fall down an internet worm hole, looking for answers or just being nosy, STOP. Dig yourself out of said worm hole and fly somewhere else.
  3. Learn new vocabulary. No negative talk. Take any sentence that contains “I’m never going to…” or “I can’t…” or “It’s not going to happen…” out of your repertoire. Focus on what you can do and will do. Negate every negative with a positive. For more insight on how to do this, go back and read my post, “Thankful for Teeth“.
  4. Be transparent. This was a BIG one for me. I didn’t want to share my story with anyone. I just didn’t want others in my business, and didn’t want others’ opinions of what I should or shouldn’t be doing. I’m a people person, but bringing my infertility struggle into the open was not something I felt eager to do. However, the minute I did publicize it, I was freed from the burden of carrying it all on my own. Transparency heals, plain and simple. We aren’t designed to carry the weight of our worlds. And, when we have problems, finding a support group of friends, family, etc is vitally important for emotional progress.
  5. Strengthen your spiritual base. “When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me…” This post is so much more awesome with a Beatles lyric in it, isn’t it? Talk to God. I’m serious. You’ve got such a powerful resource & Friend. Get to know Him a little better. Spirituality is a muscle that many of us neglect. Time to strengthen that a little. Get in the habit of regular prayer and give your cares to a bigger power.

The beauty of life is that you get to work on YOU, constantly bettering and strengthening who you are. Let’s not let a season of wait stunt our growth. 😉

Feel free to share this post with anyone you know who needs it!

WAIT

tamihallman

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